Bella Dyosa

I’m no philosopher obviously. But I’m going to let my Sagittarius North Node and Scorpio Mercury in the 9H take over this blog post. Don’t mind me.

Astrological disclaimer aside, it’s been a few years since I’ve embedded the gray area of right and wrong in my belief system. Because throughout all of my life experiences (so far), the content I’ve consumed, and the world events I’ve witnessed, I realized that not everything is black and white. At least, in my perspective.

And I’m not here to force anyone to have the same exact view as me either. That’s not what this is about. Let’s just all float into the waters of moral ambiguity for a bit. For funzies! Come on, live a little.

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Oh, and keep an open mind.

So, let’s start with something as cute and simple as lying. The old dead white man–namely, Immanuel Kant–will tell you that lying, in all shapes and forms, is wrong.

However, good sir–may you rest in peace–is someone still wrong for lying when they’re trying to evade their perpetrator? Protecting their loved one’s whereabouts? Tricking a harasser to stir their attention elsewhere? I feel like Elle Woods as I ask these questions, but y’all get my drift. 😂

Then, of course, there are white lies. We all have to admit that the universally acceptable white lie is planning a meaningful surprise for your significant other or loved ones.

The others walk a very fine line, because I’m not the type to compliment someone’s outfit when I don’t think it looks good. But also, side note: I’m not the type to ruin someone’s day by saying they look like shit. Again, VEEEERY fine line. Ethical dilemmas, amirite?

While I do kind of support the saying, “If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all”, I think it’d be great to change it to, “If you don’t have anything kind to say, don’t say anything at all.” Because there is a big difference between being nice and being kind.

ANYWAY, the point is that not all forms of lying are bad or wrong, and not all forms of honesty are good or right.

See? Gray area!! Woohoo!!! 🥳

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Speaking of lying though, to any cheaters who happen to be reading this, go fuck yourselves. You’re clearly in the black, not in the gray. 😊

Moving onto lighter subjects of moral ambiguity (if we would even call it that–you’ll know, just read): Don’t even get me started on the whole pineapple on pizza debate, because we have enough to freaking FIGHT about without getting food involved.

My stance? Each individual has their own preference. There is nothing right or wrong about a preference. Unless it puts someone in grave danger.

Which, I think, is one of the bases of this entire topic. Choice. Preference.

You see someone flipping the middle finger to the capitalist rhetoric of hustling ’til your back breaks? It’s a conscious choice.

Some people decide to climb the corporate ladder and subscribe to the narrative of “more stress equals more money”. More power to them.

While some choose to march to the beat of their own *career* drum and think outside the box of said narrative. Kudos to them too. Ergo, it is neither right nor wrong to follow what feels best for your path.

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And now… *dun dun dun duuuuunnn*!! Let’s delve into the cave of the more serious ethical issues.

Since I’m in the middle of watching Legend of the Blue Sea at the moment, I’ll tackle theft–scamming, in particular. The male lead in this Korean drama scams rich people, specifically those with ill-gotten wealth (or just rich assholes in general), and steals a huge sum of money from them. So… is that right or wrong?

Stealing (which coincidentally is the cousin of lying lol) is considered wrong in most situations. However, there is something so utterly satisfying about “eat the rich” plot lines. Subjective morality, I know.

Is it so wrong though? To stick it to The Rich Man™️ (or woman or person) and make it known that they’re not miraculously invincible just because they’re drowning in money. Robin Hood started it and he was clearly onto something.

Not saying it’s completely justifiable. I’m aware there are other ways rich demons can face the dire consequences of their misdeeds (or attitude… or both lol) aka karma. Buuuut I’m not going to scorn people who resort to their own methods of exacting revenge.

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Which brings us to another tricky (but oh so juicy) ethical dilemma: revenge. “An eye for an eye”, the saying goes.

This honestly can go either way, because on one end, the individual claims justice with their own hands, especially if and when the judicial system of their country fails them (believe this is the case for most people who seek revenge–not ALL–but most). In a sense, that’s empowerment.

Then, on the other, the weight of the karmic debt from technically harming another person may circle back to them anyway. Like an endless loop of karma… karma inception. 💀

Case in point though: revenge is one of those acts that is neither black nor white. Almost always in the gray area of right and wrong.

Aside from one’s choice or preference, their intention–the reason behind what they do–is also a good factor to consider. Take bullying as well, for example.

Younger bullies (pre-teens or teenagers) are usually bullied at home themselves. By a grown fucking adult too.

As a result, the hurt person turns around and hurts someone else, trying to regain a sense of control or power. It’s not right, but it’s a cycle we’ve seen play out again and again.

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We all know what it was like to be a teenager. We were stupid. We didn’t know any better.

Can we then say that they’re fully in the wrong for what they have done? Not exactly.

If we’re talking numbers (and this is just my take), they should be held accountable for about 90% of their behavior. The other 10% can be chalked up to emotional immaturity and reckless teenage hormones.

Now, I’m not dismissing that painful experience. I’m not bypassing the cruelty of a bully. I’m not taking their side at all.

I, too, was bullied in high school. I know what that was like. It’s shitty. While I wouldn’t wish that pain on anyone, I can’t deny that I wouldn’t be who I am now if I hadn’t gone through it – not in spite of the pain, but partly because of it.

That said, let me make this loud and clear: any form of abuse is inexcusable. Hard fucking pass and hard fucking no.

That is definitely something we, as a society, should never tolerate. It may be fascinating to zoom out and explore why abusers act the way they do. But let’s not confuse understanding with excusing. I’m not trying to sweep their bullshit under the rug.

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So, if you’re still here, amazing! You’ve taken a stroll into my Gemini moon mind. Moral ambiguity included. Thanks for bearing with me. 🤪

In conclusion, the human world is a messy place. Filled with all sorts of ethical dilemmas that boggle the mind from time to time.

Our moral judgement is influenced by how we were raised, our life experiences, and our culture, among other factors. Either way, in most cases (minus murder – hello?), we can’t harshly criticize someone for doing the “wrong” thing or hyper-glorify someone for doing the “right” thing.

We all have our own baggage to carry. Fears and traumas to heal and learn from as we navigate life. At the end of the day, it’s important to build a solid foundation within yourself with grace and compassion, so that it may echo and create ripples of kindness outward. Wherever you go, intentional or not.

And in the grander scheme of things, isn’t it always better to be kind than to be right? 😉

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Whether you think I’m right or wrong (or in the gray area lol), let’s all agree that we gotta do our best to help those in need. You can donate to the following channels for people affected by war and inhumane attacks in Ukraine, Palestine, and Lanao del Sur, Philippines.